Kids Ain't Cheap

But They Sure Are Worth It

Entertaining Children on a Budget

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My youngest two children are now 13 and 14. When they were newborns, I always bemoaned the fact that they didn’t come with a manual.

And now that I look back, I think I could write a novel on “advice I wished I had listened too.” And why!

One of the most expensive failures was my desire for my children to have the latest and greatest, the most colorful, the most entertaining toys. Christmas and birthdays were insane!

Here are my top 10 tips for entertaining your children. These are not only important for your budget, but also for raising well-balanced (read, less spoiled children.)

Infants

1. They don’t need it. Don’t buy the toys or the fancy dressings for their rooms. They can’t focus on them. Instead, read to them, sing to them, dance with them. Seriously, clothe them, feed them and spend time with them. Nothing else necessary.

Toddler and Preschoolers

2. Wrap the box. Let them play with the box. No toys necessary. No bells or whistles. They will climb in it, scribble on it, even drum on it. Let their imagination go wild.

empty box

3. Play peak a boo, play hide and seek, roll the ball and even toss the ball into the box. Chase them, tickle them and let them learn to climb on the couch and up the stairs. Supervise them but let them start to branch out a bit.

4. Continue to read to them, sing to them and dance with them. While the picture books are great, you can read anything still. They will listen. They love to hear the sound of your voice, they will improve their language skills and there is nothing more bonding than sitting next to you or in your lap and knowing that they are the focus of your attention (even if you are reading your lawn mower’s manual or your textbook for school.)

Elementary

5. This is when the “gimmees” will start. They will see a toy on a playdate or on an advertisement. It’s not to early to talk about costs. It’s not to early to let them earn money and save. It is not to early to teach them to wait. And it’s important that they learn to hear and respect “No.” 9 out of 10 times when you are ready to go purchase, they will have already changed their mind.

6. It’s time to start listening to them read. And even if they can’t read, encourage them to tell you a story. Use their imagination. Let them put on a play for you, let them dress up in your clothes, in your shoes. Put on your imagination hat and play along with them. This time will pass so fast.

Upper Elementary and Middle

7. Not only are they reading now, but they are writing. Read it. Encourage them to express themselves. Tell them to add pictures, write a novel. As a homeschool mom, I was taught to find one correction I would make and point it out. Don’t make a list. Just focus on one thing at a time…and also read it, laugh about it and ask for more.

8. Teach them about electronics. Be firm with the boundaries but empower them to find their own answers. Choose some educational experiences and games. Balance screen time with face time. You can’t keep them from it, so make sure they are prepared for it.

9. While the latest gadget is always in demand at this age, it’s the experiences they will remember for the rest of their lives. Give gifts of experience rather than stuff: art lessons, rock climbing, ice skating and bowling. Take their friends, play with them. Challenge them to try something new.

Young Adult

10. Your reading time might turn into documentaries or classic movies now. Your writing time may be replaced by study time. Electronics may have taken over their lives by now. But nothing will ever, ever replace a one-on-one face to face conversation with your child. Make time for it, even demand it. I promise you, you will not regret it and your child will not forget it.

Raising kids can be expensive. But the cost of “stuff” is not necessary to raise healthy, happy children. No toy in the world can replace the lessons learned from the time and attention of a parent. And no, it’s not too late, start today. Make a date! Grab a book. Call their name.

 

Why Your Child Should Get a Job

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At the beginning of the summer, I challenged my two youngest children, then ages 12 & 13 to make some money this summer. Then life happened and our lazy, boring summer grew quite busy and my plans flew out the window.

Now before you jump down my throat, there are lots of odd jobs a 12 & 13 year old can do to make some spending money. Cut grass, babysit and help with random chores around the house and so on. That is what I had in mind.

And while my 12 year old son did do odd jobs for his grandparents during his month long visit, it wasn’t quite what I had in mind.

I Can’t Get a Job because…

As we sat down this week to discuss the upcoming school year, I again charged my 13 & 14 year olds to get a job.

Now Hiring sign

My 13 year old son immediately chirps up that he is not old enough to get a job. And he is right. Legally, you cannot work until you are 14 and that’s with a special permit.

Then my 14 year old says, what about my sports? She has practice every school day until 5:30pm and games a couple nights a week. I reminded her that her Saturdays are completely free and the perfect time for a high school student to work.

Why Children should Work Part Time

Now I’m now asking my young teenagers to get a job to pay any bills. Although they have been challenged with paying for their summer camp next year if they choose to attend.

There are numerous studies that indicate a child working part time hours excel in numerous areas:

You can join the debate and cast your vote here.

Even if they Don’t Actually Get a Job

My 13 year old has already locked in some neighbors for mowing their lawn for the rest of the season. And I’m confident that if he does a good job, they will call him when the leaves start falling or they need help with other manual labor.

He’s already excited about the money he knows he can early over the next couple of months with just a couple hours of work each week.

My 14 year old has not begun her job search yet. She’s waiting to get through the first week of school before hitting the streets.

And even if neither of them actually makes any money, they will have both learning some valuable lessons:

  • How to apply for a job. Filling out applications can be a beast. And knowing what information you need on those applications is a lesson they will use forever.
  • How to handle rejection. We all face it. Learning to hear “No” and not take it personally is an important lesson.
  • How to be assertive. Just getting out and asking for work or for an application takes some character. Not everyone is outgoing, it takes some courage.
  • How to search for a job. While most professionals do their searching online. There is still some value to getting out and “pouding the pavement.” Going door to door can teach lots of lessons, including knowing you do not want to have to search for jobs all the time. There is value in keeping a job.

There are several things you can do as a parent to prepare your child for the job search.

When They do Earn their Own Money

When they do earn their own money, they will learn several additional lesson.

First and foremost, they will learn the value of money. Every parent wants their child to value the hard work they put in to provide for them. Working for minimum wage, and seeing part of their pay go to taxes and social security is just a small dose of reality.

They will also see just how far their money can go, or not go in many cases. They quickly learn to be grateful for what mom and dad provide when they try to reproduce it on their own.

Second, hello money management! As they have more “wants” they learn how to save their money. And saving their money means they must do without sometimes.

Finally, the beginning of independence. Making their own money, managing their own money are the first steps to true adult independence.

There are many more reasons a teenager should work, you can find another list here.

Doing it under the watching eye and guiding hand of responsible parents gives them a leg up on the rest of the world. The key is that we as parents must let them fall at times too. If we correct every mistake and save them when they get in a bind, are they really learning?

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Baby Powder – Helpful or Dangerous?

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There is nothing quite like the smell of baby powder as your put a fresh diaper on a baby. However, as early as the 1960’s the American Academy of Pediatrics was warning parents of the dangers of talcum power, primarily to their infant’s lungs.

abstract from the american academy of pediatrics

Read entire article here.

Doctors Say It’s Dangerous

In the 80’s, the frequency of baby powder aspiration reached epidemic proportions and was written up several more times by the American Academy of Pediatrics:

  • Baby Powder – A Hazard – this doctor reports that more than 50 cases were reported to New York City Poison Control Center that year.
  • Hazards of Baby Powder – doctors indicated that once the dangers of powder inhalation were publicized they began to see a progressive decrease in reports.
  • A Warning: An Epidemic of Baby Powder Aspiration – authors wanted parents to be made aware that powders were not considered essential to a baby’s skin care and to emphasize the importance of keeping baby powder out of children’s reach.

Benefits of Baby Powder

Despite the warnings and the studies, baby powder is still on the shelves on the infant aisles and many parents still use it. It is used primarily to absorb moisture from the diaper area to prevent a rash from developing.

Talc powder can also absorb odors from those adorable baby fat rolls. And if you are worried about the concerns about talc powder, many recommend cornstarch as a replacement.

fat baby rolls

Other Uses for Baby Powder

Just so you know, talc powder does have lots of other uses…not necessarily for babies!

  • Put a tiny bit in your hair if you don’t have time to wash it. It will help control the oil and keep your hair fresh longer. (Use on pets and humans alike.)
  • Remove grease stains from your clothing.
  • Prevent chafing and ease pain from waxing.

There are so many more. DIY & Crafts compiled a list of 20 brilliant uses to help you get started.

The bottom line is that you must decide what is best and safe for your infant, your family.  But know that there are lots of options for using Baby Powder even if you decide it is not safe for your baby’s skin!

 

 

Best Ways to Teach Kids about Money

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Teaching kids about money from an early age is important. My parents used the envelope system to show my siblings and I the importance of budgeting for spending, giving and savings. They kept it in their closet and doled it out as needed.

Despite their best efforts, I failed at those money lessons when it came to adulthood. I had no concept of debt load, credit and money management. When I got to the place that I was earning my own money and managing my own bills, I was on a slippery downhill slope.

I want better for my kids. I want their eyes wide open. And therefore, I started teaching them real life money lessons early.

Power of Money

They quickly learned the power of money from pre-school age on. When they had money in their hand, they were able to buy treats, play arcade games and try out new experiences.

While I guided them, and really controlled what they were exposed to as far as options, I always made sure they either paid themselves or saw me pay. They knew to get what they wanted or needed, money had to exchange hands.

Piggy Banks are a great tool during the pre-school and early elementary years. About once a month my children would get their banks out and count their money (even if it was just counting the number of coins before they recognized the differences.)

Bank Accounts

By the time my kids were half way through elementary school, they had their own bank accounts (both savings and checking) and enjoyed going in and interacting with the tellers.

They were able to earn money through chores around the house and even for neighbors. In addition, they received an allowance.

The savings rule was put into place then: save 50% of all money earned. (Doing this from the start made the transition into teenage earning, even easier, they had to save.)

The kids quickly became adapt at the language they needed to talk about money. With statements like:

  • What is my balance?
  • Please transfer $X to my checking.
  • Can I have $X as $1s, $5s or whatever.

Even now, as they are all teenagers and we have transitioned to online banking, they miss the interaction with the tellers.  Talking money was a very good life lesson.

Even if you are not ready for the real deal, there are lots of realistic money games you can play with your children that teach real life money lessons.

Manage the Grocery Budget

As the kids got a little older, I had them become more involved with managing the day to day expenses of our household. The biggest of those is our grocery budget.

Being a single mom of four, meal planning has always been a way of life.  I cannot juggle everything otherwise. From week to week, each child has a meal their are in charge of: planning, list making, preparing and cleaning.

But the shopping, can you imagine trying to manage four shoppers with different agendas working with the same money? Yeah, me neither.

Each week a different child is responsible for collecting the grocery list and doing the shopping. When we started they would be in the store with their list, a calculator and a phone. And I had to do lots of hand holding to make sure we stayed on budget and got everything we needed for everyone’s meal.

They were always so proud when they came in under budget, or found a substitution that would work better or more economically. But more importantly, they loved the power that controlling this part of our budget gave them.

There is no better teacher than real world situations, real money and real consequences. Encouraging our teens to contribute to the cost of their activities and extras is a great way to teach them the power of money and the sacrifice you sometimes have to make.

Let Them Learn the Hard Way

While kids are still under our roof and our protection, is a great time for them to learn some hard money lessons. There is nothing wrong with them having to go without, or not have the latest and greatest. It is also important for them to learn the natural consequences of bad financial choices without having to go without food or shelter.

Here are some other ideas of ways you can help guide your child toward a healthy relationship with money, good financial decisions and empower them use their money wisely.

 

 

 

 

Six Reasons Why Teaching Children About Home Security is a Must

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Around 16 percent of child abductions each year take place at the victim’s home. Many parents take home security measures but fail to recognize that the children must be involved. While it’s instinctual to impart lessons on how to react to strangers in public, what to do when there’s an earthquake or how to respond to a threat of fire, teaching kids to deal with the possibility of home invasions is not always something that crosses the mind of parents or guardians. Here are just some of the reasons why you need to teach children about home safety and necessary precautions.

Photo courtesy of OpenClipart-Vectors via Pixabay

Your home security alarm system will be useless

You took the extra effort to install a Honeywell home security system. You even scoured the market for the best system available. Yet you could be missing one important detail:  teaching your kids how to actually use it.

As much as you’d like to, it’s not always possible to be by your kids’ side. Unfortunately, they’re not always safe, not even at your own home. So make sure they can protect themselves even when you are not home. Explain to your children how your home security system works, and carry out a hands-on demonstration for good measure. Also, take the time to explain what the security system is for, and why it is important that they know their way around it. Emphasize just how they should respond to an emergency situation when you are not around.

If you are subscribed to a third-party monitoring service, make sure your children know the passcode. To ensure that they remember the passcode, have them repeatedly recite it back to you. Don’t forget to properly educate them about the dangers of giving out the passcode to the wrong people. Also, most security alarm systems are connected to a phone. Teach your children how to respond to a buzz from the security company, be it a legitimate threat being reported or a mere false alarm.

Photo courtesy of Neshom via Pixabay

Doors and windows are often taken for granted

Keeping doors and windows locked is one of the most basic and important steps in home security, yet it’s also one of the most neglected. This is especially true now that children are more distracted than ever, what with all the gadgets, video games, and Internet stuff keeping them preoccupied. One of the best ways to ensure they keep doors and windows locked is by helping them make a habit out of it. This way they could have it in their system and start doing it on automatic mode. Remind them as many times as you can to lock the door behind them after entering or leaving home. You should also teach them to constantly check doors and windows while at home.

Unlocked doors and windows are practically an invitation for unwanted invasion. Make sure your children understand this.

Photo courtesy of Maklay62 via Pixabay

The basic concept of stranger danger

While most kids understand that talking to strangers is a major no-no, many throw caution to the wind when they’re in the comfort of their own home. Remind them that the old stranger danger rule applies to people knocking at the door as well. While it’s easy to assume that refusing to open the door to strangers would come naturally to kids, you must avoid getting complacent. It’s actually common for children to open the door without checking who’s behind it, as their first instinct is often to avoid being rude to adults.

Repeatedly emphasize to your children that checking who’s at the door is important before opening it, and that they must never open it to people they do not recognize. Teach them to make it clear to the person knocking that there’s an adult at home. Tell them to also check with the adults first before opening the door, even if it’s someone they know.

Photo courtesy of Pixabay via Pexels

Children need to know they have 911 to turn to

It’s likely your children already understand what 911 is for. But unless you’ve gone out of the way to talk to them about it, steer clear of assumptions. Take the time to sit down and actually have the conversation. Explain to your children when the best time to call 911 is and how to go about it. Many parents have been saved by their own children, even by really young ones, by a simple 911 call. So make sure the idea of 911 is deeply ingrained in your children’s system.

Photo courtesy of Ongchinonn via Pixabay

Dangers lurk on social media

Dangerous strangers are not always at the door. Sometimes they’re on social media, accessing your home via your kids’ gadgets. It’s easy to assume that kids are on the Internet watching wholesome shows, playing games or simply talking to their friends. But kids are naturally curious, and could easily give in to the attraction of the unknown.

Majority of 10- to 12-year-old kids are already active on social media platforms like Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, in spite of the platforms’ age restrictions. Predators and burglars alike are taking advantage of this. For your kids’ safety, it’s absolutely important that you stay on top of their Internet use and that you remind them of the dangers online. Make sure that you act as their ally so they do not end up feeling suffocated and rebellious.

Photo courtesy of Pixabay via Pexels

Security should be a family affair

Your security efforts will be most successful if the whole family is involved. As young as they are, children can compromise your home’s security because of their innocence and vulnerability. So keeping them involved and educated is not optional, it’s absolutely necessary.

Arrange family meetings where you discuss essential safety skills. Make it as engaging as it is somber. Above all, instill the importance of staying secure without instilling fear. Being fearful and panicky will only exacerbate the danger, and that is no way to live. It’s especially toxic for children. So tread wisely when instilling security lessons.

That being said, have regular security drills at home. For one, teach your children not to reveal to strangers that their parents are not home. Set up role playing games that will teach them to respond to situations where they have to talk to strangers on the phone or at the door. Also, make it absolutely clear that they can’t announce on social media that their parents are not home. And take the time to create and discuss emergency plans for situations like home invasions, fires, and natural disasters.

Your home is your place of solace, as it ought to be. But don’t let this lull you into complacence. Teaching your children the value of home security and the ways to deal with possible threats will go a long way in keeping them safe. Your children are your greatest treasure and should be guarded in all the ways possible.

 

5 Ways to Buy Cheap Christmas Gifts for Kids

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5 ways to find cheap Christmas gifts for kids.Some people shop all year long for Christmas. Others wait until December 24th. Wherever you fit in that spectrum, you still want to score a deal. Americans spend $830 billion on Christmas, according to a 2013 statistic. If you’re looking for cheap Christmas gifts for kids, then here are five tips that will help.

(Got any kids 5 and under? Here’s a great list of gift ideas for them!)

SnagShout

If you’re a fan of Amazon, especially around the holidays, then check out SnagShout.com. It offers hundreds of deeply discounted products you can purchase in exchange for a review.

How does SnagShout work:

  • Browse their merchandise to see if there is something you’d like to purchase. Often these products are marked 60% to 90% off. Some products are even free.
  • You’ll be given a specific SnagShout code to enter at check out.
  • These are Amazon products, so you’ll be automatically transferred to Amazon to complete your purchase.
  • Once you’ve received and tried out the product, you must leave a review on Amazon to complete your agreement with SnagShout.
  • After that, you’re permitted to shop for your next SnagShout product.

Giving SnagShout products as gifts is tricky since you do need to leave a review. I’m certainly not suggesting you lie because that’s unethical and could get you banned from SnagShout. The best solution is to purchase the item for your child, let him play with it, then ask what he thinks. You could also purchase an item of which you’re already familiar and leave a review based on what you already know.

Off-season clearance racks

Fall and spring are great times of the year for garage sales. Every changing season brings a deep discount (i.e. end of summer, back to school, end of winter, etc.). If there are huge discounts on summer clothes during the fall, then you could score some big savings on next year’s summer wardrobe and give them as Christmas presents.

Swagbucks

If gift cards and online shopping are your preferred methods for finding cheap Christmas gifts for kids, then look up Swagbucks. This is one of the most popular survey + reward sites because it offers a wide variety of ways to earn. They include:

  • Searching the Web
  • Online shopping
  • Surveys
  • Watching videos
  • Playing games

You could earn points the next time you shop online at Toys R Us, Target, Old Navy, or the Disney Store. Cash in your points for free gift cards for Amazon, PayPal, Walmart, Target, Visa and more.

Click here to sign up for your free Swagbucks account.

Make gifts

Cheap Christmas gifts for kids come in every shape in size. One of my favorite things about Pinterest is that there are so many options for making awesome gifts for your awesome kids. Not everything is cheaper to make at home than it is in the store. However, I encourage you to at least consider this route, especially if time is on your side. I made a no-sew blanket for each of my babies, and could easily work on it while I watched a movie. Fabric stores often have coupons for supplies, so I saved money and gave my kids something homemade they’ll have for a long time from their not-that-crafty mom.

Groupon

One of the coolest gifts you can give your kids is the gift of experiences. Groupon is a great resource for discounted events and adventures. Search “Groupon + Your City” to find some kid-friendly events happening near you.

Do you start Christmas shopping before or after Thanksgiving? Tell us in the comments below?

Image Credit: Andrew Neel (UnSplash)

This post may contain affiliate links. If you make a purchase, Kids Ain’t Cheap will receive a commission, but we only recommend products that we know and love. Thank you for your business!

5 Reasons You Shouldn’t Buy Your Kid a Car

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Although I’m not sure I remember every car I’ve driven over the years, I do remember the first one. It was big, green, and nearly as old as I was. But, it was mine.

It was my brother’s car first, purchased before he went away to college. Once he graduated and got a job, he bought a newer one and turned the keys, and the car, over to me.

My family didn’t have much money. I was sure I wouldn’t have a car at all until I could save enough to buy one myself. Therefore, even though I didn’t pay for it myself, I still appreciated my car and tried to take care of it.

Not all of the kids I went to school with had cars back then. Times have changed, though, and it’s almost expected now for parents to provide their kids with a car.

But maybe buying your teenager a car isn’t the best thing you could do for them. Here are 5 reasons you might not want to buy your kid a car.

1. They Need to Learn How to Earn What They Get

One of the reasons you shouldn’t buy your kid a car is because they need to learn how to earn what they get. Part of your job as a parent is to teach your kids responsibility.

Of course, you should provide for their basic needs, such as housing, clothes, food, etc. But giving them everything they want in life is not going to teach them to appreciate what they are given.

You could argue that they will have to pay for the gas and any repairs but not the actual car. Even with those financial responsibilities, it may not be enough to teach your kids that they get what they earn for themselves.

There is a saying that if you “give a man a fish you feed him for a day but if you teach a man to fish you feed him for a lifetime”.  Applying it to this situation means giving your kid a car isn’t the best thing you can do for them.

2. They may not Take Care of it

Another one of the reasons you shouldn’t buy your kid a car is because many teens are not good at taking care of their stuff. If yours is one of them, do you really think it’s a good idea to spend thousands on a car for them?

Before shelling out a ton of money on a vehicle, consider whether or not your kid is ready to take responsibility for the car. Talk to them about changing the oil, filters, wiper blades, and other regular maintenance.

If it is clear your kid expects you to pay for repairs and give them gas money you can certainly say no to the car.

3. It Could Help Them Build Credit

Putting your kid in debt at a young age isn’t necessarily the ideal situation. For one thing, you will probably have to co-sign the loan. But perhaps it’s a better option than buying your kid a car and paying for it yourself.

A loan could work to their advantage when buying their own car. If they are responsible in making their payments on time, it can help your kid build their credit for future purchases.

4. Is it the Best Use of Your Money?

Buying your kid a car may not be the best use of your money. This is just one more reason you shouldn’t buy your kid a car.

For instance, you might be able to take the money and invest it for your future retirement. Or, pay down debt instead of buying your kid a car.

5. It May Cause Them to Study Less

If your child is given a car, it may lead them to feel like they are free to come and go as they choose. This is especially true if you have not given them strict rules on when they should be home at night.

With too much freedom, your teen may spend less time on the things they should be doing, such as studying. This could cause their grades to drop and threaten their ability to get into a good college.

So, what do you think? Should you buy your kid a car?

Jeanne is a married mother of 2 grown children who works a full-time job, has two side hustles, and also helps out occasionally on the farm she and her husband own together. Her background is finance and medical office management, and she hopes to help others improve their finances and change their futures.

Juggling Kids & Life – A (Realistic) Daily Schedule for Stay-at-Home Moms

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Daily Schedule for Stay-at-Home MomsWe’ve all read blog posts mapping out our best chance for productivity, right? Ever read one and just think, “Not a chance”? As moms, juggling our kids, errands, hobbies, business, etc. turns our quest for productivity into a search for the Holy Grail. Therefore, we’re going to spend today looking at a realistic daily schedule for stay-at-home moms.

A Daily Schedule for Stay-at-Home Moms – Hot Mess Moms Welcome

The other day, I read a post by a successful online entrepreneur who is also a new father. John Meese structured his schedule around what he calls “The Perfect Day.” Here is a quick overview:

  • 6:00 AM – Wake up, exercise, eat breakfast
  • 9:00 AM – 12:00 PM – Work
  • 12:00 PM – 2:00 PM – Lunch, rest, recharge
  • 2:00 PM – 6:00 PM – Work
  • 6:00 PM – End of Day – Family time

I really do think that would be the perfect day. I mean, a two-hour lunch break to just read a book? Or even nap?

Ah, bliss.

The problem is, this beautiful schedule is simply unobtainable for stay-at-home moms. It’s not Meese’s fault; he didn’t write it for us. But too often, I think we see this as the ONLY option and throw in the towel when we can’t keep up. How can a stay-at-home mom physically get up at 6:00 AM and expect to get something done after waking up three times in the night to soothe a teething baby?

And approximately how many lunch breaks do you get, mama?

How about that “work until dinnertime” notion? Guess who’ll be right at your ankles every seven minutes asking for a snack if you’re not in the kitchen working on dinner?

Hear me out. Til my dying breath, I’ll tell the world that being a mom is the greatest gig in the world. But if I want to find a balance that actually fits my lifestyle, then I need to let go of a few expectations.

Here are a few examples.

Letting Go of Expectations

You can’t expect to function with the same schedule as a breadwinner.  If you signed up to be the stay-at-home mom, then your priority lies with the munchkins. Do you still deserve time to yourself each day to recharge? ABSOLUTELY. You just need to find it in different ways. Sometimes, that means swapping childcare with another mom once a week. It might mean establishing quiet time every afternoon if the children don’t nap anymore so you can have an hour to yourself. You could even hire a sitter to watch the children one day a week if that’s what it takes to give you balance.

You can’t expect the schedule you implement today to still work in three weeks.

When I first became a freelance writer, I made a simple goal to write each morning at 6:30. That worked for approximately two weeks until my infant began teething through the night and my toddler suddenly wanted breakfast at 4:00 AM. I was a hot mess trying so hard to stick to my writing schedule. Changing my plans felt like failing, but you know what? It’s exactly what needed to happen. So, I extended myself some grace, slept when my kids slept and started swapping childcare with a friend to accomplish my writing tasks.

Now, let’s take a look at a slightly more realistic daily schedule for stay-at-home moms…

A Daily Schedule for Stay-at-Home Moms to Fit Your Lifestyle

Pre-Breakfast – Tend to yourself – Whether that means to sleep in, read, exercise, shower, or just sip coffee in silence.

Morning – Tend to your family – Spend this time intentionally caring for your little ones: i.e. Make breakfast, get the children dressed, make crafts, go on playdates, visit a library.

Recommended Reading: “9 Important Values to Pass Down to Your Children”

Lunch – If you’re planning time in the afternoon for your hobby or at-home business, then find creative and simple finger foods to make for lunch. An elaborate, three-course lunch will zap your afternoon energy reserves faster than a hailstorm. Use wraps to make PB&J roll-ups, for example. The less clean up, the better.

Afternoon – Naptime/Quiet time – Once the kids are down for naps or have a few activities to play quietly in their room, it’s time to clock in. If your kids are anything like mine, then they like to sneak out of their rooms and check if quiet time is done approximately 18 times, no matter how nicely (or firmly) you ask them to stop. If that wrecks your concentration like it does mine, then leave the heavy focus for child-free time. For example, I can email, design social media graphics, or outline during quiet time, but I can’t write a chapter in my book.

Evening – Family time – Maybe your brain is able to function once you’ve cooked dinner, fed the family, cleaned up, bathed the kids, read them stories, and said good night, but I’m absolutely FRIED after 8:30 PM. My best move is to hang out with my husband watching Netflix or read a book. If you can work on your hobbies and interests, then go for it.

By the way, if you’re looking for ways to make money from home, check out these 14 jobs that are worth a stay-at-home mom’s time!

This daily schedule for stay-at-home moms is obviously just one broad stroke of the paint brush. Your life and your interests will look differently once applied to this list. Therefore, let’s hear how you find the most balance in your week.

Share some of your best ideas for a daily schedule in the comments below!

9 Important Values to Teach Children

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important values to teach childrenParents have the greatest privilege in the universe. We have the opportunity to raise kids – to construct important values to teach children and witness the result. At the end of the day, they are individuals – separate from us – who have their own minds, hearts, hands, feet, wishes, and skills. Even so, seeing my kids become the people they were meant to be is a delight.

I love seeing my young daughter spin around in our living room as a ballerina. Then I see my son carefully line up his trains or the way he tends to his stuffed animals when one of them gets “hurt” and needs a bandage.

From a young age, our children show us so many beautiful values they explore. However, kids enter the world with a free will, which means that “Me First” mentality kicks in pretty early. It is our job as parents to start conversations about right living – about healthy values.

Here are a few topics for you to begin the conversation with your child:

9 Important Values to Teach Children

“Making the decision to have a child – it is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ”
― Elizabeth Stone

Work Ethic

Understanding that money comes from labor is a fundamental lesson that will stay with your child through adulthood. You can employ him or her to do chores around the house, bring up topics to discuss, or simply lead by example in your own field of work.

Giving

Kids are such natural givers. Somewhere along the way, we figure out it’s really fun to just keep what we have and use it on ourselves. Tapping into their young minds and encouraging things like gratitude, contentment, and giving can also stay with your child for life. It may mean letting her see you tip extra for the server or give to a charity or hand

Kindness

This world is full of cruelty, especially on the internet. Our kids are among the first generation growing where this level of connection and advancement in technology is simply a way of life. Learning to offer a kind word or do something nice at a young age will help your children counteract the ever-rampant negativity out there today.

Prioritizing Family

It’s so easy to take one’s family for granted. As children grow, it’s vital for parents to help them understand the value of keeping family first. There will be a thousand things that will try to take its place – especially when your children reach adulthood.

Integrity

As kids age, they have more and more responsibility placed on their shoulders. Therefore, they have more opportunities to do things when others aren’t hovering over their shoulders. Whether they’re male or female, what they decide in those moments matters so much more than they realize.

For example, Ellen recently tested her audience members by placing hidden cameras at the free gift booth. Before the show, each member was told she could select one free item from the table. One woman was caught on camera taking multiple items and returning to the booth two more times for more! Ellen not only showed the tape to the millions of viewers of her show, but she then called out this audience member and made her sit on a stool in “Ellen Jail” right in front of everyone.

Sure it’s a light-hearted example, but the message runs deep. Check out Ellen’s reaction to the woman who robbed her booth here:

Capacity to Apologize

My kids’ favorite movie is “Moana.” They love the music and love racing around the house pretending to be the demigod Maui shouting “Chee-hoooo!”

One of my favorite parts of the film is actually toward the end when Maui comes face to face with someone he robbed. At first, he tries to laugh it off until he sees the hurt look in the other character’s eyes. I love what happens next. He looks her in the eye and says, “What I did was wrong. I have no excuse. I’m sorry.”

What a great example for kids to see the power of owning up to their actions. To be held responsible for those choices. It’s another life lesson that would likely stay with them for life.

Try Your Best

Could we please dissolve the old adage “Practice makes perfect”? Talk about setting unrealistic expectations for kids. Now hear me out – I’m not a big fan of participation ribbons or removing competition altogether. It’s important to learn how to win AND lose with dignity and respect; however, walking up to the plate with perfection as the goal isn’t going to fly.

Remind your kids to try their best, and then remind them again. And again. Just keep that flag flying!

Money Management

So many 18-year-olds graduate with almost no money management skills. Then, they fill out paperwork for colleges and make the largest financial decision they’ve ever made which typically lands them in debt up to their eyebrows. Being equipped with the head knowledge and habits of handling money while they’re under your roof will make their entire adult life completely different.

Caring for the Environment

Your kids may not grow up wanting to major in environmental studies, but educating them about how to be less wasteful should start in the home. Think about your own habits, like not littering and sorting out recyclables. Your kids will see how you treat the world around you. Taking time to talk through those things or initiate something unique like planting a garden or using compost will help them learn skills to better protect their environment.

Final Thoughts

There are so many more values we could cover. In fact, it may seem overwhelming some days. Just remember these happen one day and one conversation at a time.

What’s on your list of important values to teach children? Is it on this list? Let us know in the comments below.

The SAHM Budget Test: How to Afford to Be a Stay-at-Home Mom

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how to afford to be a stay-at-home momCan moms really afford to live at home full-time with their children? So many families are trapped by student loan and credit card debt, requiring both parents to work full-time outside the home. I’ve been in those shoes. Today, through a myriad of challenges, and a few key triumphs, I discovered how to afford to be a stay-at-home mom.

We’ve covered a wide range of topics centered around finances and SAHMs (listed below). Be sure to check those out if you haven’t.

Meanwhile, I put a unique spin on today’s article and have prepared a “SAHM Budget Test” for you.

Why?

Throughout the last six years, my husband and I experienced a complete turnaround of our money habits, our careers, and the trajectory of our future together. It started with asking questions.

“Is debt crippling our future?”

“Do we need an emergency fund?”

“How do we talk about all this?

As we answered every question, we discovered something. Every decision you make with your finances is interwoven with your life and that of your family’s.

So it was with my journey toward becoming a stay-at-home mom.

The SAHM Budget Test: How to Afford to Be a Stay-at-Home Mom

Rather than recount the details of how my husband and spent three years working our financial plan that enabled me to stay home full-time, I’m going to ask you some of the most important questions we asked ourselves. These questions helped us stay focused on what would work for our family rather than falling back on whatever society or our peers were doing with their money.

Dave Ramsey calls it “Living like no one else so that one day you can live, and give, like no one else.” I couldn’t agree more.

Do you know exactly what you need to live on each month?

One of the best ways to answer the question “Can I afford to be a SAHM?” is to calculate EXACTLY what your family must live on each month. For example, compile your list of utilities, bills, and essential expenses like food and gas. This list should include what you’ll realistically purchase even if it’s not a need (i.e. money for restaurants or Starbucks), but do your best to trim.

We’re just looking for an honest snapshot.

Can you practice living on your significant other’s income right now?

I don’t recommend anyone quit her job and stay home without practicing a single-income lifestyle for at least 90 days. The reason is my husband and I stunk at first! We needed MUCH more than three months to crack down on our excess spending and to adjust our lifestyle in order to function solely on his income. But the practice was like a life jacket when we swam to the deep end and officially let go of my income.

Will you need to bring in a supplemental income from home?

There is a TON of pressure on moms these days to make money from home. And it’s really a shame. Should they do so if they truly feel that calling? Absolutely! But not out of guilt or peer pressure. I work 15 hours a week as a freelance writer and am so passionate about what I do. However, I didn’t earn a dime until well over a year after I turned in my keys at the bank. It takes time to build a profitable business from home, so do NOT factor that as an income source unless you have an established business!

Instead, read the next question to consider other ways of utilizing more of your partner’s income.

What can you no longer afford on one income?

When you practice the single-income budget for a few months, it’ll become more clear what changes will need to happen in your current lifestyle. This dream of staying home may require drastic action.

For example, do you need to sell your newer vehicle and buy a 10-year-old Honda? What valuables can you sell for a profit? How about downsizing? Is the size of the mortgage payment preventing you from buying enough groceries on one income?

I’m not saying you can’t own a home. Just weigh the opportunity costs. For the first few years of staying home, you may need to make some sacrifices in your lifestyle to achieve your goal. But I can speak from experience when I say the time at home with your kids is a wonderful distraction from the things of which you let go.

Test Results

How’d your answers turn out? Do you have a better feeling about how ready you are to financially stay home? I hope, more than anything, this didn’t discourage you if the answers weren’t to your liking yet. Educating yourself about your own financial snapshot is the first (and bravest) step toward this goal.

Remember, it took me three years.

If you’re ready to take step two and really begin forming a plan of action toward becoming a stay-at-home parent, I’ve put together a resource just for you. “The Stay-at-Home Mom Blueprint” is the ebook I wish I had when my husband and I first got married. It includes our story of becoming debt-free and finding a way to live on less than $2,000 a month while I stayed home. It also includes 150 strategies to:

  • Chop debt
  • Save money
  • Sell household goods
  • Create healthy conversations about money  with your spouse
  • Make a budget that works for your family
  • Start an at-home business
  • Maintain a healthy, single-income lifestyle for years to come

SAHM Blueprint

If you’re ready to take your next step and access this digital resource, follow this link for more details.

Your Turn: Got a tip for how to afford to be a stay-at-home mom? We want to hear it!

This post may contain affiliate links.

Don’t forget to check out these additional tips for SAHMs!