At almost ten months old, my daughter is still not sleeping through the night. She wakes a minimum of twice between 8pm and 7am. Realistically it’s probably closer to four times. When all else fails, it sometimes comes down to me nursing her back to sleep even though I know she isn’t waking due to hunger since she nurses well throughout the day and is now on solid foods. She wakes because she needs something. Reassurance, mom, or just comfort.
After ten months it’s exhausting still waking as much as we do. I expected it in the early days and first few months, but I wasn’t prepared to still not be sleeping through the night at ten months. This is one of those ”not in the brochure” items. I’m not complaining though.
As I sit in her room, holding her in our rocking chair desperately trying to get her back to sleep at 2am, I remind myself she won’t need me for long. That I need to cherish even the difficult moments because in just a few very short years I’ll be begging her for a hug and cuddle.
She will learn to sleep eventually. Though it seems very natural to us as adults, sleep is a learned skill. I can’t look my daughter and ask her to just close her eyes, relax and fall asleep. We all know it isn’t that easy. We’ve tried many different sleep training techniques but they don’t work for us. We always end up back to the family bed where we all sleep better. Not perfect, but better.
Don’t Leave Mommy!
Separation anxiety is another thing we’re now dealing with. My understanding is that if a child goes through this phase it peaks around nine to ten months. Yippie. If she’s tired and mommy isn’t around, all hell will break loose. It can be frustrating to be cooking dinner and have a baby become super clingy, only wanting to be held. To be trying to clean the house and have her decide that she needs to be held instead. Again, in these moments I need to remind myself that she’s a baby and she needs me. Sometimes Dad, Auntie or Nanny won’t do. She needs reassurance and cuddles from mom. I know that in a short time I’ll be missing these very moments, wishing for her to need me again.
It’s easy to let life dictate how you spend your time. The messy kitchen can always wait. My child will only need me for a short time in her life. I need to remember to concentrate my time on addressing her needs, no matter what time of day or what else I may have planned. I need to accept and embrace these short-lived interruptions.
There’s a saying, Good moms have dirty floors, messy kitchens, laundry piles, dirty ovens and happy kids. This will be my new mantra.
Catherine is a first time momma to a rambunctious toddler. When she isn’t soaking up all that motherhood has to offer, you can find her blogging over at Plunged in Debt where she chronicles her and her husbands journey out of debt. You can also follow her on Twitter.
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