Kids Ain't Cheap

But They Sure Are Worth It

How to Plan a Great Date Night on a Budget

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Spending time with your significant other doesn't have to be expensive. Here's how to plan a great date night on a budget.People will tell you that once kids come into the picture, having traditional date nights will be hard, and they’re right.

For a multitude of reasons it becomes difficult to get away sans kids. We’re bad for not making it a priority. Part of the reason for us is that quite honestly we enjoy having our daughter around. It’s not too often that we’re eager to get away from the responsibilities of parenting and be alone but we know it’s essential to our marriage.

You don’t realize how little engagement you and your spouse have until you’re in a situation where it can happen. Though we get away or go out, we usually have our daughter with us and no fault of hers, she consumes almost all of our attention and conversation. She’s at an age now where if we tell her we need a few minutes to talk or whatever she gets slightly offended so it’s more appropriate to just plan an evening or day where she can have fun doing kid stuff (with a sitter) and we can have uninterrupted time alone.

Dates don’t have to be expensive.

When we were planning our anniversary last month we decided to take a little afternoon road trip instead of spending a bunch of money on each other and something like a fancy dinner out. We were home by supper time but it was so nice to sit in the car together for a few hours and just chat. We stopped for lunch and went for a little walk around a few local stores. Including lunch and gas the whole day probably cost us $100 this is, without a doubt the most we’ve spent on ‘’each other’’ in a long time.

When you’re on a budget you really feel the pressure when it comes to dating your spouse. Start with easy areas to save, we started with nixing unnecessary gifts. It really is the thought that counts and saving your money to reach your financial goals will keep you much happier than a materialistic item. Discuss this if you decide to do it though so feelings don’t get hurt. Budget or not I’ve never been on who wants gifts. I just don’t really like ‘’stuff’’ and if we’re going to spend money I’d rather save it for an experience together rather than something like a fancy watch.

Dates at home can be fun. Buy a few cheap treats at the store, and watch a movie together. This is something we don’t do enough and have few excuses as to why not. Getting a babysitter to even run errands together can be fun. Sounds dorky but we love a kid free stroll in Costco! Learn a card game, cook dinner together when kids are in bed…

Having a date with your spouse is about the time together not money spent. It be hard to get past the traditional ‘show up with flowers and wine and dine’ your spouse but especially after becoming parents you’ll quickly realize it’s about making the time for other person, regardless of what the event actually is.

What’s your favorite cheap date?

The Importance of Date Night

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Importance of Date NightBefore I had a child, I never put much thought into date nights with hubby, they always just had a way of happening. They were never fancy but since we didn’t have a child to tend to, we had a lot of time for each other. I remember my aunt telling me at my baby shower to make sure I paid attention to myself and my relationship with my husband or it may dwindle away. She was right. Not that the relationship with my husband is going away but it has certainly changed. It is so important that we remind each other what our relationship was like before having kids.

Our daughter is the center of our universe. 99% of our conversations are about her or our family. If the conversations aren’t about her, they’re about our budget, schedule, work, nothing exciting. Five years ago this wasn’t the case. Five years ago we were planning our life and dreams out. We were connecting in different ways. While I expect our relationship to grow and change as it evolves, it’s still important to remember, and pay respect to, the foundations that brought us together.

 

Date Night Doesn’t Have to be Expensive

I remember one of our first ”fancy” dates. Shortly after we graduated high school, hubby was working his way through university and was getting his first real paycheques. He took me to a nice reservation-only steak house. I was having heart palpitations the whole time, not at the experience but at what I knew it was going to cost him! Though the food and service was great, I simply cannot justify spending hard-earned money in that way (fancy restaurants). When he asked for my honest opinion about the evening I told him, and boy, was he relieved! He wouldn’t be going to the poor house to woo me! I was an easy-going girl who wanted time, not monetary filled experiences.

Date nights for a couple with children should be about reconnecting with each other, not spending  money. Here are just a few date night ideas that can be done on the cheap:

  • Evening picnic with favorite foods/wine (or daytime if it’s the only time you can get away!)
  • A coffee date. Save your money, don’t bother on a full meal and enjoy a good cup of coffee/tea/hot beverage and talk about anything and everything but kids.
  • Walk/hike/bike ride. Getting exercise and being together is an easy way to make sure you’re together yet not distracted by cell phones/computers etc.

More marriages end up in divorce than not. I know my husband loves our daughter more than anything but we set time aside for each other. This summer we’re taking out first real vacation in a long time and I plan on getting a baby sitter one evening so we can have an evening out. Shhh. Don’t tell my husband 😉

It is impossibly easy to fall in love, yet impossibly hard to stay in love. Don’t be a statistic, this is your reminder to make time for your each other. A better relationship with each other will ensure you are better parents.

How do you make time for each other?  Do you have date night?