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Should Grandparents Have to Pay for Their Grandchildren’s College?

April 24, 2025 | Leave a Comment

Image Source: Unsplash

College costs have climbed to the point where a single year can feel as expensive as a small mortgage. It’s no surprise that parents often look beyond their own savings for help—and grandparents are usually first in line to lend a hand. For many retirees, writing that tuition check feels like a joyful “living legacy.” For others, it comes with a quiet question: Can I afford this and still protect my retirement?

Before any promises are made, families need an honest, numbers-based conversation—one that honors both the desire to give and the very real need to stay financially secure.

Understand the Motivation and the Money

Generosity is emotional; gifting is financial. Start with a family meeting—parents, grandparents, and, if appropriate, the student—to outline:

  • Goals. Is the gift meant to cover one semester, four full years, or only unexpected costs?
  • Capacity. Review fixed income, market-dependent assets, and potential health-care expenses.
  • Boundaries. Agree on a spending cap or time limit so no one feels blindsided if markets dip or life happens.

Clarity at the start prevents two common pitfalls: grandparents over-promising and parents over-relying.

Direct Tuition Payments: A Tax-Smart Route

Current tax rules let anyone pay tuition directly to an accredited college without triggering federal gift tax.

Pros

  • An unlimited amount and an immediate way to shrink a taxable estate.
  • Not reported on the FAFSA, so it usually won’t reduce federal need-based aid.

Cons

  • Covers tuition only—families still need a plan for room, board, books, and fees.
  • Some private colleges count outside resources when adjusting their own grants, so always ask first.

Tip: Pay semester-by-semester rather than in one lump sum, giving flexibility if circumstances change.

529 Plans Offer Flexibility—Timing Matters

Grandparents can open or fund a 529 plan, allowing tax-deferred growth and tax-free withdrawals for qualified expenses. Withdrawals from a grandparent-owned 529 count as untaxed student income on the following year’s FAFSA. Many families wait until junior or senior year to tap those funds, when aid calculations are largely complete.

Close-up of U.S. dollar bills and coins on a table
Image Source: Unsplash

Know the Financial-Aid Ripple Effect

Direct tuition payments aren’t reported on the FAFSA, but 529 distributions (and some other gifts) can shrink need-based aid. Schools that use the CSS Profile follow additional rules. The safest move: call the college’s financial-aid office before any money changes hands.

Protect Retirement First

Rising health-care costs and market swings make large gifts risky for retirees. Once savings leave an IRA or brokerage account, they’re hard to replace.

A good rule: if the gift could compromise long-term stability—or force adult children to support aging parents later—it’s too much.

Creative Ways to Help Without Paying Tuition

  • Fund smaller needs: Laptops, books, or semester transportation.
  • Teach money skills: Budgeting sessions or scholarship hunting.
  • Co-sign responsibly: Back a modest education loan only if income allows.
  • Provide non-financial support: Career mentoring, a quiet study space, or simply cheering from the sidelines.

The Bottom Line Isn’t Just Dollars

College help is generous, but it’s not the sole measure of love. Transparent conversations—and a plan that fits both generations—matter more than any specific dollar amount. The most valuable inheritance might be guidance, encouragement, and shared wisdom along the journey.

When Love Meets Limits: Finding Balance

There’s no one-size-fits-all answer to grandparents paying for college. Tax-smart tuition payments, well-timed 529 withdrawals, or smaller “extras” can all ease the burden without sacrificing financial health. Start with an honest family discussion, loop in a trusted financial advisor, and remember: contribution is optional; connection is priceless.

What role—if any—do grandparents play in your family’s college-funding plan? Share your experience in the comments below.

Read More

  • 5 Ways to Prepare Kids for College
  • 7 Key Ways to Save for Your Kids’ College Education

Samantha Warren
Samantha

Samantha Warren is a holistic marketing strategist with 8+ years of experience partnering with startups, Fortune 500 companies, and everything in between. With an entrepreneurial mindset, she excels at shaping brand narratives through data-driven, creative content. When she’s not working, Samantha loves to travel and draws inspiration from her trips to Thailand, Spain, Costa Rica, and beyond.

Filed Under: Parenting Tagged With: 529 plans, college tuition help, estate planning | Money & Family, family finances, grandparents financial planning, paying for college, student financial aid

College Doesn’t Have to Cost a Fortune

March 23, 2023 | Leave a Comment

Person Holding Their Graduation Cap in the Air

I have three children—one is attending a community college, and the other two are finishing up 7th and 8th grade. I have immersed myself in learning about the college application process and how to pay for college and get merit scholarships. What I am finding makes me a bit sad. So many students are taking out loans for tens of thousands of dollars, but college doesn’t have to cost a fortune.

We Won’t Take Out Parent Loans

My husband and I agree that we won’t take out parent loans for our children’s college. Every parent has to decide if they’re willing to go into debt for their children’s educations, and we’re not. My husband and I both attended graduate school and started our careers in our late twenties and early thirties, so we must make up for lost time regarding retirement. We are choosing to prioritize our retirement over our children’s education.

We’ll Encourage Our Children Not to Take Out Loans

Likewise, we encourage our children not to take out loans. But, if they must, we don’t want them to take out loans for more than $15,000 to pay for their four years of school.

Based on our own experiences, students tend to think they’ll pay off their student loans quickly, but then life interferes. The jobs they get after college may not pay as well as they thought they would, or they may want to start a family and find one person needs to pause their career to take care of the child. If they both continue to work, daycare can be expensive.

It’s better not to get loans at all, if possible. If not, keeping the loans to a minimum is important for our family. Federal student loans are often less expensive than private loans, so if your kids have to borrow, going with Uncle Sam is marginally better.

We Encourage Our Kids to Pursue Merit

We’re also encouraging our kids to pursue merit scholarships. Our son got a scholarship to a community college; the remainder of the balance for his tuition is low enough that my husband and I can pay it. Our son will not have any student loans during his first two years of college.

They’ll Stay Local If Necessary

Girl studying with a book on her lap

Our two younger children plan to apply to several colleges and see if they get merit aid. If they don’t, we’re lucky to have several colleges and universities within 30 minutes of our house. They will choose one of those schools rather than go into debt to pay for college.

Final Thoughts

Every family must decide what is best for their children when it comes to choosing a college and paying for it. However, college doesn’t have to cost a fortune. My husband and I have told our children how much money we have to help them through school. To make up for the difference, they’ll have to get merit aid or choose a local school. Using this plan, they should graduate with no or minimal debt, and my husband and I won’t have to take out any parent loans.

Read More

3 Mistakes We Made in the College Process

4 (More) Great Part-Time Job Options for College Students

Non-Traditional and Easy Jobs for College Students

Melissa Batai
Melissa Batai

Melissa is a writer and virtual assistant. She earned her Master’s from Southern Illinois University, and her Bachelor’s in English from the University of Michigan. When she’s not working, you can find her homeschooling her kids, reading a good book, or cooking. She resides in Arizona where she dislikes the summer heat but loves the natural beauty of the area.

Filed Under: Money and Finances Tagged With: college education, paying for college, student loans

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Basic Principles Of Good Parenting

Here some basic principles for good parenting:

  1. What You Do Matters: Your kids are watching you. So, be purposeful about what you want to accomplish.
  2. You Can’t be Too Loving: Don’t replace love with material possessions, lowered expectations or leniency.
  3. Be Involved Your Kids Life: Arrange your priorities to focus on what your kid’s needs. Be there mentally and physically.
  4. Adapt Your Parenting: Children grow quickly, so keep pace with your child’s development.
  5. Establish and Set Rules: The rules you set for children will establish the rules they set for themselves later.  Avoid harsh discipline and be consistent.
  6. Explain Your Decisions: What is obvious to you may not be evident to your child. They don’t have the experience you do.
  7. Be Respectful To Your Child: How you treat your child is how they will treat others.  Be polite, respectful and make an effort to pay attention.
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