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What To Do When You Find Our You’re Pregnant

April 13, 2016 | Leave a Comment

Pregnancy is an exhilarating time for expectant mothers. If you just got a positive pregnancy test here are five things to do.Taking a pregnancy test is, without a doubt, one of the most intense moments of any woman’s life. When you do finally see the result as being positive, your mind races, like a million miles per minute in many different directions. Your brain definitely goes into a bit of shock when it does see those two little lines, so if you do find yourself holding a big fat positive in your hand, here’s what to do next:

Tell your loved ones

Obviously if you haven’t already, tell your significant other! Some people have fun ways to tell all pre-planned for when the day comes but I wasn’t that thoughtful with my daughter, I just showed him the test, assuming he’d know what it was or how to read it. I’d also consider telling the ones closest to you (mom, best friend), people who you’d want to know both good and bad news. I’d hold off on telling the rest of the world until you get the clear from your doc (around 12 weeks).

Call your doctor

Your family doctor will likely be the one to order the initial bloodwork. Your first appointment will likely be basic stuff like vitals, possible urine sample and a few questions (like when was your last menstrual period). Some family docs may even follow you through the whole pregnancy and delivery, or choose to set referrals up to have you established with an obstetrician. They will also figure out your due date.

Look into your insurance

You may want to have a peek at your insurance coverage so you know what kind of coverage you have. Some plans cover specialists who you may need to start researching now (like a midwife). It’s also good to know as pregnancy goes on as other professions may come into play like potential physiotherapy, massage therapy or acupuncture.

Start thinking about telling work

I know you just found out but in some jobs it may be advantageous that they know early especially if you have a lot of appointments. Depending on what you do for a job, you may literally need close to nine months to start getting someone else ready to take over for your maternity leave as well. Some employers would appreciate as much notice as possible to fill your vacancy.

BREATH

It’s emotionally overwhelming to see that positive, whether it’s your first or 5th so do your best to relax and not get too overwhelmed. Nine months is a long gestational period and everything will find a way to work out.

Pregnancy is an exciting and interesting journey. Enjoy it and don’t be afraid to ask for help when needed! I was too stubborn at times and more than once overdid it. It’s amazing how hard easy tasks like grocery shopping can become. Try to not wish the next nine months away and enjoy the whole experience.

What was the first thing you did when you found out you were pregnant?

Catherine
Catherine

Catherine is a first time momma to a rambunctious toddler. When she isn’t soaking up all that motherhood has to offer, you can find her blogging over at Plunged in Debt where she chronicles her and her husbands journey out of debt. You can also follow her on Twitter.

plungedindebt.com

Filed Under: Family Time, Parenting Tagged With: Pregnancy, pregnant

My Wife’s Pregnant – Now What?

July 11, 2013 | 1 Comment

wife's pregnantCongratulations!  You’re having a baby!  Holy shit!  You’re having a baby!

Even if you’ve been trying for a long time, getting a positive pregnancy test is a huge deal!  It mean’s your wife is pregnant.  You’re excited.  You’re nervous.  You really have no fucking idea what to expect!  That’s great and exciting.  You’re in for a wild ride.

Here’s the next steps on what to do once you find out your wife’s pregnant, and what you can expect as a husband or partner.

 

Is This For Real?

Your first instinct may be to dismiss the positive pregnancy test for a bit.  Guess what – there’s really no point.  In fact, these test are 99.9% accurate, especially if it has been a few weeks since your wife’s missed period.  These tests are over 90% accurate even before she was supposed to have her period.  The bottom line is that if you took a home pregnancy test and it was positive, you’re pregnant.

The big if is this – the test simply detects the hormone her body emits when there is a fertilized egg.  Her body starts producing it very early on, and there is still a chance it won’t be a viable pregnancy.  That’s why you still need to go to the doctor to confirm.

 

Setting Up a Dr. Appt

Once you get a positive pregnancy test, you should setup a doctor appointment between 6 and 8 weeks (or 2 to 4 weeks after her missed period). During this time, the doctor will do a trans-vaginal ultrasound to confirm the pregnancy (yes, that is an ultrasound where they stick the wand up the ho-ha).  The cool thing is that this will be the first glimpse you’re going to get of your baby!

It’s going to look like 6th grade biology – a little round circle of a cell, that has a little flutter in the middle – your baby’s heartbeat.

However, this appointment may not be all good news.  Many early detected pregnancies are not viable – upwards of 33%.  In many cases, you’ll never know – it ends like a regular period even though the egg was fertilized.  However, some can go longer, and you may make it to this point.  That’s why confirming the baby is essential when moving forward.

 

Telling Your Family

For all the reasons above, the standard for telling people you’re pregnant is 12 weeks.  Once you get past the 12 week mark, the odds of having a miscarriage are extremely low – so it’s safe to let people know.  It’s also the time when you can be a little less worried about whether everything is okay, and start worrying about what you’re going to do when you have a little one in a few months.

 

Be Supportive

You just need to be supportive during the whole process.  Your wife’s body is going to be taken over by the little guy or girl, and hormones are running wild.  You’re in for a wild ride, and you’re going to be surprised by it all.  Just be there, as best you can.

 

Be Prepared

Finally, you just need to have a basic level of education about pregnancy and child rearing. Pregnancy is a time of extreme change and its going to impact both your current relationship and your future with your partner.  The best thing to do is pick up a copy of Dr. Spock’s Baby and Child Care. Its a classic that’s had something like nine revisions in the past 60 years, and its sold millions of copies. Get it in paper back on amazon for like $6 bucks.

For help on what to teach your children as they grow check out these articles.

Raising Polite, Responsible Kids
Raising Money Smart Kids
Raising A Child On A Budget: How To Save Money And Be A Happy Family

If you’ve been through this with your wife or husband, what advice do you have?

Brian
Brian

Brian is the founder of Kids Ain’t Cheap and is now sharing his journey through parenthood.

 
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Filed Under: Medical Tagged With: pregnant, we're pregnant, wife's pregnant

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Basic Principles Of Good Parenting

Here some basic principles for good parenting:

  1. What You Do Matters: Your kids are watching you. So, be purposeful about what you want to accomplish.
  2. You Can’t be Too Loving: Don’t replace love with material possessions, lowered expectations or leniency.
  3. Be Involved Your Kids Life: Arrange your priorities to focus on what your kid’s needs. Be there mentally and physically.
  4. Adapt Your Parenting: Children grow quickly, so keep pace with your child’s development.
  5. Establish and Set Rules: The rules you set for children will establish the rules they set for themselves later.  Avoid harsh discipline and be consistent.
  6. Explain Your Decisions: What is obvious to you may not be evident to your child. They don’t have the experience you do.
  7. Be Respectful To Your Child: How you treat your child is how they will treat others.  Be polite, respectful and make an effort to pay attention.
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