Christie’s post got me thinking about staying at home and being a full time mom. This is something that has crossed my mind more than once since I had my kids. It is a bit different here though. Let me go through this a bit.
I have never wanted to be a stay at home mom. I can say that without feeling any shame or guilt because it is the truth. I can say for sure that as far back as I can remember I always wanted to be a corporate big shot. I dreamed of being the Tiger Lady, just as Dianne Keaton’s character was in ‘Baby Boom’ (a movie in the 80’s that is still one of my favorites today). When I graduated from University, I made getting to that corner office a main goal. So when I got married and had kids, you can imaging how confusing it was for me to want to stay home and to want that big time job as well. It resulted in some pretty bad mommy guilt for a while.
Today, I am a single mom of two kids. I have a 5 year old who is ending his second year of preschool and a 3 year old who will start her first this year. I now would like to have a job that I feel fulfilled in and enough time to enjoy the fruits of my labor with my kids. How ironic that now that I want this, it doesn’t seem like the choice to make right now.
Single parenting is tough
My country is not so good with single parent support. The government believes heavily in the nuclear family and does a lot to support that model. We are only now starting to join the rest of the free world in creating support for other kinds of families. As such, it is impossible to rely on government support that is enough or sustainable as a single parent. Schools are expensive here as well. At least private ones, and these are the best here, save the national university. And again, there is nothing there to help single income households.
So, to support my little family, I have to work a full time corporate job with some writing and teaching on the side. Again, funny how that corner office might actually be possible at a time when I may prefer to take it a little easier.
So, stay at home mom life isn’t the way to go for now. But I am optimistic that it may become the case in the future. My grandfather always said that you get what you work for, so I am working to get that laid back life with my kids.
Just thought I would share that.
What are your thoughts on being a stay-at-home parent vs a working parent?