Kids Ain't Cheap

But They Sure Are Worth It

How Much, If Any, Should You Pay Your Kids For Chores?

| Leave a Comment

Should you pay your kids for chores? The answer isn't always so simple. Here's an idea of when you should and shouldn't.When kids are young there aren’t many ways for them to earn money of their own. Household chores are an easy and accessible way for kids to do so. Unlike an allowance, which I think is something that, when given, should be given out of funds that would already be allocated to the child, earning money from chores is a way of kids to work for their money.

I think there should be a level of expectation being a child who lives at home in terms of contribution to the household. Being a kid isn’t an excuse to not contribute to daily chores. Even at three years of age, my daughter is expected to help clean every mess she makes, as well she helps me with easy tasks like unload the dishwasher or simply putting something in the garbage can when asked. We have friends however, who do everything for their kids.

Children need to understand that running a house isn’t ‘’free’’. There is a lot of work and effort that goes into it and the responsibility isn’t just the parent(s). Everyone who lives under the roof should use their abilities to contribute.

In my opinion there are certain chores should never be paid for. Every child should have basic chores regardless of age. These chores should be determined by the parents, taking many things into consideration, but basics like maintain a clean room, help with laundry (a life skill they need to know) and help with meal prep and cleanup are examples of ‘’chores’’ that are expected, not rewarded for.

If a child is looking to earn money consider making a chore chart. A list of ‘’extra’’ chores, with an associated dollar amount which they can choose from if and when they need additional money.

Examples may include something like:

  • Clean garage- $10
  • Wash mom/dad’s car- $10
  • Weed yard- $20
  • Clean litter box (dump old litter and wash)- $5

These are household tasks that need to be taken care of and give the child the opportunity to do so. Notice there is no simple tasks like ‘’make bed’’ or ‘’put away laundry’’, again these are simple tasks that are expected to be done regardless.

My experience is that too often kids leave home with a diluted perception of how a house is run. So many kids leave home never cooking a meal, turning on a washer, using a clothesline or washing dishes and it terrifies me. Chores aren’t established as a way for parents to have control over their children (though there is some of that too ;)) it’s a way of teaching responsibly and life lessons.

How a family decides to establish a chore system is unique to each family but not having a child do any household chores only does damage to the kid and their future.

Do you enforce household chores? What, if anything do you pay your kids for?

Gardening As a Family

| Leave a Comment

Gardening as a family is such a fun and frugal activity. We spend only $50 a year on it and have a ton of fun.Growing up I remember my mom spending hours at our local gardening center picking out her annuals for our bazillion planter boxes. Being a kid I would get dragged along and initially hated every second of it. ‘’Why does she have to look at every single flower? They’re all the same, just pick one!’’. As the years went on I slowly became more interested in it. I began to learn her favorites by name and why she was choosing certain flowers over others. On top of my mom’s love for annual planter boxes we also had many perennial flowers on our property which required some maintenance but were, for the most part, pretty self-sufficient.

It took a few years but by the time I was about 12 I had a genuine interest in gardening. This late spring tradition is something I’ve already started with my daughter, just three years old. When I asked if she wanted to help Mommy pick out some flowers she immediately lit up and demanded I get ‘’all the pink ones’’. While she hasn’t quite grasped color variation she will learn I’m sure.

Gardening is something that families can do together and it is something that fits every budget. If my budget was unlimited I could spend thousands every year on gardening stuff from lawn care to my own annual planters but I don’t. I usually set a budget of about $50 per year to buy annual requirements and it seems to satisfy what me and my family require.

I limit my annuals to four planter boxes. Two in front and two in the back. I mix them up with a few larger established plants, inexpensive fillers like tall grasses and smaller less mature plants and allow them to establish themselves through the summer. For new soil and flowers I spend about $30. The rest of the money is usually spent on new herbs and a few veggies. I buy them in the summer, keep them outside then move them inside for as long as they live through the fall and winter.

Growing herbs and vegetables is a great way for families to all be involved. Kids have fun planting and helping to ‘’take care’’ of the plants which they can then eat. If you’re fortunate enough to have an in-ground garden to grow these types of things it’s great. If you don’t, you can build one for cheap (check our Pinterest for ideas). The only reason I don’t have an established garden is because the only ‘’perfect spot’’ for such a garden is smack in the middle of our back yard which would drive us crazy mowing and this isn’t our forever home, I don’t want to rip apart the yard for a garden someone else may hate.

We grow in containers and it usually does well, our deck gets great sun exposer. Our daughter has a little watering can she can use to help water the plants. She will also be able to help pick the herbs and veggies as they mature and she can learn about the whole plant to food process.

Gardening is something I love doing. It’s something that can really help a family too- learning to grow your own food- as well something that can be truly enjoyable and an activity entire families can do together.

Do you garden with your family?

Preserving Family Memories

| Leave a Comment

What's your favorite method for preserving family memories? While mine can be a little on the expensive side it's what I prefer to do.My friends make fun of me for printing pictures in 2015. Not just one cute picture of my daughter but hundreds a year, or at least 100 per year I should say. I feel like I am of a dying breed in this digital world but I know I’m not alone!

Growing up I would spend hours on the weekends going through my mom’s collection of family photos. I never got tired of them. I never got sick of the stories either. I feel like this is a dying art though. People now have Facebook and Instagram to share their pictures. Gone are the days when people didn’t know what was going on in your life until you showed them the photos but it’s something I don’t plan on stopping anytime soon, especially since I can tell my daughter, at only three, is already as into photographs as I was as a child.

What kills me though is how expensive this hobby can be! Though you can still have photos printed for cheap- if you wait for sales- everything else is very expensive. I recently capitalized on Costco’s $0.10 print sale and needed a new album to hold everything. Though I haven’t yet given up, the cheapest album I could find for the size I wanted, was over $25.

Preserving family memories is a delicate art for me. I want to keep everything but I hate clutter. I like printing pictures and holding them more than relying on digital only, though a 100% digital life, including memory preservation, is always an option (I also love my digital photo frame).

In terms of kid’s crafts, I have to choose. For any special occasion she will bring home two to five crafts and we just don’t have the space to keep it all. Instead I sometimes will take a picture of the ones we’re not keeping- or ones that are super large and won’t fit in storage and place the photos with the box of items we have opted to keep. I have also heard of parents not keep anything and instead taking a picture of it instead.

For our wedding photos, I had photobooks made which were really nice but had their limitations. For one, they were much more expensive than printing and as well we had to be choosier in what photos we wanted in there due to their sizing limitations. I like printing pictures and not fussing about the page layout and every other detail that goes into making the photobooks though I do still really like them, especially if you score a great promo price!

Some people would argue that these sorts of ‘memory preservation’ are a waste of money, to each their own I guess. For me having a cupboard full off overflowing photo albums is happiness and more memories as I look forward to the day she crawls into my lap and asks all about that day we did ‘’x’’ before she was born.

How do you preserve your memories?

I’m So Glad I Spent Money On…

| 1 Comment

Being good with money does't mean being cheap. Here are three things I'm so glad I spent money on. What about you?There have been many instances in my life where I kick myself for wasting money. Sometimes it’s not really a big deal but there have been times I’ve wasted hundreds on crap that I either didn’t need or wasn’t exactly what I was looking for. I’m happy to report though there have been times that my husband and I have spent a few extra dollars on something and it’s been well worth it. With a family to look out for we’re especially cautious with our money.

Our Mattress

We were sort of fortunate that when our apartment flooded we were given a substantial replacement cheque for certain items, including our bed. The bed that was ruined in the flood was purchased for $100 off a friend. When we were handed a $3,000 cheque to buy all new bed and bedding we were excited. When we went bed shopping we didn’t look at price initially but went by feel. Thankfully the bed we fell in love with was on sale and rang in at $1,200. It’s worked out very well for us.

After owning it for about three years we noticed some deformation on one side of the mattress but because it was covered under warranty they replaced it zero questions asked. Many years later and we’re still happy with the purchase.

Engagement Ring Warranty

I’m so glad I wasn’t with my husband when he bought my engagement ring, though I would have talked him out of it, I’m so glad he got the extended warranty on my ring. I think he paid an extra $140 for the lifetime warranty and I have used it at least 10x over this price. The warranty includes all sizings, repairs, scratch removals, lost diamonds, you name it and it’s covered. In the last eight years, I have had my ring sized (no joke) probably six times, rhodium plated (redripping in gold to remove scratches) probably 10 times, repaired twice and cleaned a bazillion times. All the work I had done would have cost me at least $1,000 and thankfully I paid zero dollars. It’s been a huge help!

Treadmill

About five years ago my husband and I were trying to decide if we wanted to re-join a gym. Instead of joining we decided to save our money and buy a good quality treadmill instead. We looked for sales and in the end found a $3,000 treadmill on sale for less than $1,000. It has worked out very well for us and it gets used regularly, especially in the winter! I was worried it may become a place for clothes to hang but I’m happy to report we use it. Especially with a young child it’s nice to have the ability to get some exercise in without being required to leave the house.

I love looking at a purchase and knowing we made a good decision. We work hard for our money so it’s nice to see it being used and enjoyed.

What are some of the best purchases your family has made?

Mother’s Day Gifts by Age and Budget

| Leave a Comment

Unsure of what to get Mom this year? Check out these Mother's Day gift ideas by age and budget.I have always loved Mother’s day. As a child growing up I found Mother’s day crafts in school we’re always the most fun (in hindsight probably not a coincidence since most of my teachers we’re female, and moms themselves- always prepping cool gifts they’d want to receive themselves!). As an adult, and now a mother myself, it’s a special day.

I admit that it takes a lot to be a mom. It is the hardest thing I will likely ever encounter in my life. From pregnancy to raising a successful child, it is hard. I think Mother’s day and Father’s day are two of the most important days of the year. Though gifts aren’t necessary, much like a birthday it’s nice to feel appreciated and most people enjoy tangible objects.

What a child is able to accomplish in terms of gifts will vary depending mostly on age and as well, budget. The best gift I ever received (and likely will never be topped) was a homemade video my husband made for me on my birthday- it’s not always about how much money one spends. Time, effort and thought far outweigh any monetary denomination.

Gift from…Babies

Budget Idea: Have the babies’ footprint or handprint placed on something. Moms love baby feet and hands more than can ever be explained. Make an impression in dough or casting kit or use ink to take imprint and place on an object (picture, ornament, flower pot….anything!)

More Expensive Idea: Have a piece of custom jewelry made with mom and baby birthstones. You can do this with rings, necklaces or even keychains. There is no shortage of birthstone ideas. They can be purchased at local jewelers as well as online at craft sites like Etsy.

Gift from…Young Children

Budget Idea: Plants. This is a general idea that can be broaden however you want. A simple vase with flowers is nice, custom paint a flower pot and have a child plant some seeds or bulbs. For less than $10 you could come up with a fun craft with that young kids would enjoy helping with

More Expensive Idea: A family dinner out. Now that my daughter is a little bit older, and able to sit down without wanting to run around everywhere, I enjoy taking her places (without worry of toddler containment!). A nice dinner out would be much appreciated by mom for sure!

Gift from…Older Child-Adult Children

Budget Idea: Time with mom. Probably the cheapest idea of them all but honestly the most important. Especially as kids get older, busy, and more involved in their own independence, mom would LOVE a day with you- distraction free.

More Expensive Idea: Take mom on a date out. A mom/child date is a super nice idea. Totally up to you what you plan but whatever it is, she will love it. Huge bonus points if you’re earning your own money and budget a date for her!

Mother’s appreciate the thought put into Mother’s day. They know how hard they work and honestly deserve at least one day of recognition! Show mom you care and make her feel special.

What plans do you have for Mother’s Day?

Sounds Like You Discuss Family Finances With Your Kids?

| Leave a Comment

Wondering if you should discuss your family finances with your kids? I think you should. Here's why.I had a conversation with a woman I know recently about money and kids. She made a comment about hiding her income tax papers from her kids so they wouldn’t come across any details of her and her husband’s income. ‘’I don’t want them seeing our gross income and suddenly thinking we’re rich and they can have anything they want’’- she explained. She and her husband make decent income and she is doing her best to hide this fact from her kids. She is of the opinion that children shouldn’t be involved at all with their money.

She and I differ. I think kids should very much be in the know when it comes to family finances. They need to know and understand how money works and where else can they learn (multiple times), with the security that is home? Though I have learned quite a bit about personal finances, it was all self-taught, as an adult. In the situation of this couple, she has a learning opportunity with her kids to educate them. She can, and should, teach them how far money really goes.

I read something once that said the easiest way to teach kids about taxes is to eat 30% of their icecream. She can start with this point. Show her kids the number on paper and then show how much is taken away in taxes. Now there isn’t as much money, is there? Kids think $100 is a lot of money when in reality you’re only taking $70 home for every $100 earned and of that $70 it gets split between food, housing, savings, and family activities it really doesn’t go as far as a child may think and they need to see this, not be sheltered from all finances.

Saving is so important. Both Long term and short term savings goals are not only vital to financial success but help prevent debt- one of the most important financial lessons you can teach your kids. Even though it may be your retirement goals, kids need to see how much work it is to reach this goal. Maybe you’re saving for their post secondary, show them. Let them know how much of your money you put aside every year for their future goals.

Financial education is not something we can assume they will learn outside of the home. Unfortunately they don’t learn enough about it in school, despite it being one of the most important skills a child will ever learn. Kids will appreciate the trust you give them in discussing the family finances. There are many ways you can go about actually having the conversations and you can release as many or as few details as you want. I’m of the opinion that it’s a family unit and though there may only be one or two income earners the money if for the family, the more transparency they better.

Do you share financial details with your children? If so, how much detail?

5 Ways to Keep Family Costs Down

| Leave a Comment

Let's be real - having a family is expensive! Here are five smart ways to keep family costs down.A family, as a unit, is expensive. There are a lot of expenses when multiple people are involved and the costs add up- quickly. If you’re not careful these costs can bust a family’s budget but with a little planning you can find a decent balance. There are a few areas that are more obvious when it comes to the question ‘’where is all the money going?’’ but since being aware of it is half the battle you can try to avoid the creeping costs all together.

Meal Plan

Food is a massive portion of a family’s budget and meal planning is the easiest way to avoid going over in the food category. If you’re looking to keep costs down, meal planning is a must. Involve everyone in the family to make sure everyone has a say. You can also involve the older kids in the cooking of the meals they help plan.

Prioritize Extracurriculars

Most people have interests, hobbies and extracurricular activities. If everyone did everything they wanted all the time it would likely be much too expensive. Sit down as a family and prioritize what is most important to everyone and come up with a financial plan to keep both family members, and budget- happy. It’s not fair if one kids plays hockey, soccer, piano lessons and takes art classes but you tell kid #2 you can only afford for them to play soccer because there isn’t enough money left in the budget. Things need to be fair for everyone!

Limit Vacations

Vacations, especially ones that involve airfare, are expensive. Rather than trying to plan a vacation every year take some time off and enjoy cheap fun around home. Save the larger trips for every few years (if even that frequent) and find cheaper ways to enjoy time off. When (and if) you do plan a larger trip shop around and capitalize on reward programs as much as possible to keep costs down.

Shop Used

Certain things can definitely be purchased used, especially children’s items like clothes and toys. You can save huge amounts money by shopping around and looking online and in second hand stores. The speed at which kids grow gives a large selection of gently used great quality clothes and toys to choose from.

Limit Eating Out

Eating out is expensive especially when multiple people are involved. There are ways to do it (like capitalizing on kids eat free nights) but the best way to save money is to do just that- save it and eat at home. Save eating out for special occasions only and everyone will enjoy it much more when it’s an anticipated treat.

Though having a family has more costs than being single or a couple there are ways to avoid letting the family costs consume all your money. It takes a little planning and awareness but it is possible to keep family costs down!

How do you keep family costs down?

Keeping Family Documents Safe

| Leave a Comment

Doing some spring cleaning? Don't forget about keeping family documents safe. Here's what to do.Sometime between Christmas and summer I get an urge to clean and organize everything in our home. I think this comes from a combination of the influx of new gifts at Christmas (in with new, out with old), the fact that we spend more time inside in the winter so I’m surrounded by ‘’stuff’’ and the fact that come summer, I don’t want to do any of this so I want it done beforehand!

Things have changed for us a bit over the past few years. Since adding a child to our family suddenly there are a lot more important ‘’things’’ in our home. Things I want protected in the off chance something were to happen to us or our property.

Paper Documents

Passports, birth certificates, proof of insurance, you name it, if it’s very important we keep it in a fireproof safe. I thought about getting a safety deposit box but it seemed like more effort. I was lucky enough to receive a large safe from my in-laws for Christmas, which we use to all important original documents.

If it’s something you can have duplicates of (think insurance papers, not passports) scan them and keep a secondary copy on a computer or ideally in a cloud like Dropbox which you could access anywhere in the world.

Pictures

One of the things I am most thankful for in this technology age is digital pictures. I need to get better at backing them up but it’s a lot less stressful than only having that one single original picture like our parents. I have a memory card that I upload all my important pictures to which again, goes in the safety deposit box. I also like to print some pictures giving me an added copy.

Kid and Family Stuff

Though we couldn’t possibly keep every little craft or picture she makes us, there are some things she has made that I can’t imagine ever losing. I have decided I can’t let it get out of control though, I bought a small airtight plastic container to save these things in and once it’s full we need to stop or cut back. Though this wouldn’t  be any good if we were in a fire or something alike, it’s safe from everyday ‘house elements’ and I also take pictures of my favorite, special crafts which again gets backed up.

Computer Stuff/Digital Life

External hard drives can be a lifesaver. You’d think I would have learned my lesson when my computer crashed in university, losing everything, but it took losing my computer full of non backed-up photos of my child to really learn the lesson. I now back everything up on an external hard drive- which again can go in the safe, or a cloud- which I have access to anywhere in the world.

Life is suddenly more precious when an entire family is involved. If a fire hit our house I couldn’t care less about our clothes, dishes or appliances but if I lost my first Mother’s Day card I’d be devastated. Kids put everything into perspective, keep your family safe and make sure your important things are protected!

How do you keep your family documents safe?

Non-Sugar Easter Egg Ideas

| Leave a Comment

Looking for some Easter egg ideas? Here are nine of them that aren't candy!I love Easter. Whatever reason you celebrate the season, it’s a fun time. It’s often less busy than Christmas and I look forward to the slower pace. To me it’s pure innocence. Kids have fun with the Easter bunny, churches are beautifully decorated, flowers make their appearance and usually, spring is here.

It’s a time for family which I always look forward to. We get a long weekend to be with each other and have a feast with our extended family to celebrate. Having kids put a whole new element of fun into it. Though I’ve always enjoyed the holiday, having fun with my daughter and watching her explore everything has been super enjoyable.

Since my husband and I started playing the role of the Easter bunny (something we’ve already failed at since our almost three-year-old found our stash), I’ve become more aware of sugar and treats. Don’t get me wrong, I love candy and chocolate, and I certainly allow my daughter to have some too, but when we as her parents do an Easter basket for her, and I know other friends and family will also have treats for her, I try to control what I can on our end. No three-year-old needs as much candy as I know is coming to her in the upcoming week.

We bought her very little candy and chocolate full-well expecting the rest of the family (grandparents and aunts mostly) to act out on their need to buy treats for her 😉 Instead we opted to focus on some non-sugary treats to put inside the eggs for her Easter egg hunt and I thought I would share my list of ideas:

  • Tattoos. I don’t know about all kids but my daughter thinks they are the coolest thing ever.
  • Stickers. The local dollar store has small baggies of loose stickers making them easy to put in her eggs.
  • Jewelry. Again dollar store to the rescue for cheap plastic play jewelry.
  • Hair stuff for girls.
  • Playdough. You could fill the egg with playdough and keep the original container to place back in.
  • Money. Who wouldn’t love few extra dollars? My grandparents put money in some of our eggs at Easter with the expectation we’d put some extra on the collection plate later that day at church.
  • Toys. We found some extra-large eggs this year, something like a hotwheels car would be able to fit easily.
  • A Prayer. If you follow a religious aspect of Easter placing a sweet Easter prayer inside is a nice way of passing it along.
  • Gift certificate (or alike). Depending on how much you spend it might be an idea.

Again, I’m not a candy hater. In fact I look forward to Easter candy more than any other treat in the rest of the year, but kids tend to get so much sugar it is nice to have other options. The less candy she gets, the less I eat so there’s an added bonus too 😉

What sort of Easter treats will you put in your kids eggs?

Also read:

Would You Make Your Kids Pay You Back For Their Braces?

| 1 Comment

make kids pay for their bracesOrthodontic treatment (aka ‘’braces’’) are expensive. The materials aren’t cheap and it’s a long process- usually 12-24 months’ worth of adjustments, fittings, elastics, retainers, it’s a lot of work. I see it every day from pre-treatment to end of treatment. It’s a big topic in dentistry for both kids and adults. Though there is a large population of adults who wear braces, most clients I see are children (or young teens) who are going through treatment, basically because their parents signed them up for it.

The dentist I work for will not place braces on a patient until they (the patient and parents) have full understanding (regardless of age) of the importance of retaining after the treatment is done. 9.5 times out of 10 a person MUST wear their retainers, at least weekly for the rest of their lives, if they want to keep teeth perfectly straight. Yes there are some miracle cases that stay even though the retainer has never been in the mouth, but there’s a slim to none chance teeth will stay straight without some retention. Teeth want to go back to their original position no matter how ‘’right’’ the corrected position is.

Given that most of the ortho people we see are young kids, who despite us reminding them constantly, rarely wear their retainers properly and end up with relapse. Sometimes it’s mild and doesn’t bother them but we see a few cases of almost 100% relapse too where the braces are removed and they simply never bother retaining the teeth.

I had one of these cases in last week. He was a 22 year old male who went through full ortho treatment six years ago. Admittedly he never bothered with the retainers and his teeth have almost totally relapsed. He was complaining because his mom made him pay her back.

His mom paid cash for his braces. Their insurance didn’t cover it so for two years his mom and step dad made monthly payments on his account for his $5,000+case.  He explained that she was mad at him for allowing his teeth to relapse and because he didn’t hold up his end of the bargain by wearing his retainers and she wanted a refund now that he was working full-time.

It got me thinking, though I work in the industry so I feel like our situation may be a little different, the fact remains that if (and likely, when) our daughter gets braces, she will be 100% informed the entire process. Unless medically necessary (there are some instances and there almost a 0% chance she will fall into one) I will not put braces on her until she agrees to follow all directions, including wearing retainers. Though I will gently remind her to wear them occasionally (how could I not being a mom and dental hygienist?) I will not hound her. It’s her responsibility and if I don’t think she could handle it, I won’t do it.

If she agrees and commits 100%, but ultimately fails due to neglect, I’d be super disappointed and may come up with an ultimatum. Though certainly not for everyone, I don’t necessarily think this mom in question was wrong for asking for her son to pay her back as he had made promises to her- as a young adult.

Would you ever ask your kids to pay back for such an expense?